Preparing Your Tweeny for the Teen Years

Visit us at our new blog on wordpress.com at : Hearts of Moms Blog :) We are no longer updating this blog.

Being a Teen is more challenging today than it was during our growing up years. Life was simpler then. At least that is how life was for me.

But with the pressures and demands of school and the ever changing value systems of culture and society, being a teen can be a very intimidating and even frightening thought or experience.

As parents, we can help prepare them for these changing and challenging times by talking with them and preparing them for the changes that will be taking place in their bodies and their emotions.

It can be frightening for the young child to see these changes taking place without being prepared for the changes. Better we help them understand and be prepared than they get their "lessons" from the wrong sources or their just as ignorant peers and friends.

The books listed below are great books to help get our tweens (9-12 years old) and younger teens be mentally and emotionally prepared for what is ahead. These books are written simply, in a fun but engaging way. The illustrations and examples make growing up fun and exciting.

The books below are also biblically based with emphasis on purity of mind and body. Most of these books cover many questions that the child may be shy or embarrassed to ask their parents about. These are also great books for moms to read, to gain a better understanding of what is happening or will be happening to their little darlings, especially for moms with boys. :) A good refresher for moms of girls too, for some of us may have forgotten what it was like to be growing up with all these changes taking place in our bodies :)

These books are also wonderful launching pad for conversations with them regarding their fears and anxieties.

So do look up these links and check out these great books for boys and girls.

• Lintball Leo's Not-So-Stupid Questions About Your Body by Walt Larimore, MD, Mike Phillips, John Riddle
  
• My Changes (invert / Middle School Survival Series) by Mark Oestreicher & Scott Rubin
  
• The Body Book: It's A God Thing! by Nancy Rue
  
• The Beauty Book (Young Women of Faith Library, Book 1) by Nancy Rue
  
• Body Talk (Faithgirlz!) by Nancy Rue
  
• So You're About to Be a Teenager: Godly Advice for Preteens on Friends, Love, Sex, Faith and Other Life Issues by Dennis & Barbara Rainey together with Rebecca & Samuel Rainey
  
• Preparing for Adolescence: How to Survive the Coming Years of Change by Dr James Dobson
  
• Passport2Purity (Book & CD Set) by Dennis Rainey

And some books for us moms as well to prepare ourselves for the oncoming changes and challenges in our tweenie's life.

• Raising Teenagers Right (Pocket Guides) by Dr James Dobson
  
• Parenting Today's Adolescent Helping Your Child Avoid The Traps Of The Preteen And Teen Years by Dr James Dobson
  
• Boundaries with Teens: When to Say Yes, How to Say No by Henry Cloud & John Townsend
• Parenting Today's Adolescent Helping Your Child Avoid The Traps Of The Preteen And Teen Years by Dennis & Barbara Rainey

And while you are here, do look up the children's books on purity and integrity by Jennie Bishop and how we can reinforce these values into our tweenies and teens :

• The Princess and the Kiss
• The Squire and the Scroll
• Jennie Bishop's Books
  

Fear or Faith!

Visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

FEARLESS Mom Session Recap

Fear or Faith? Which do you choose? This is the challenge Max Lucado posed us in his Parenting Fearlessly podcast message.

The fears and anxieties carried by moms are just countless and we can be so overwhelmed by these fears that the way to parent our children, guide and teach them is ruled by the FEAR in our lives.

Max Lucado showed us through the video that God knows and understands the pains and fears of parents.

Through the story of Jairus, Max Lucado showed us how Jairus sought out Jesus to heal his sick daughter and how Jairus invited Jesus into his house and what Jesus did for this family who sought Him out!

Similarly, we too can look to Jesus and pray regarding the fear and anxiety we have for our children and put our trust in Him because Jesus cares for us, He cares for our children!

One thing that struck quite a few of us is the reminder that our children do not belong to us. They belong to God. They are God's gift to us. When we give our children back to God, He gives them to us, in the right way!

As a symbolic act of giving our children back to God and committing our kids to Him, each of us were given 2 stones and we wrote our children's names on these 2 stones.

With names of your children written in each of the stones, place each stone in each of your hands and lift them up to the Lord as an act of committing and surrendering of our children to the Lord.

In the Old Testament, God commanded Moses to instruct the High priest to take 2 onxy stones and to inscribe the names of the 12 tribes of Israel onto them and place these stones upon the shoulders of the High Priest’s garments. This was to serve as a reminder in 2 ways : (1) The sacred responsibility of the High Priest, and (2) The weight of the stones was to remind them of the commandment of God to continually lift up the names of the children of Israel to the Lord.

Similarly, we are God’s royal priesthood and we have the names of our children carved upon our hearts and these stones are symbolic reminders for us to lift up our children to the Lord in daily prayer and surrender.

For those of us who were not able to join us yesterday, you may also want to get some garden stones and write your children's name on them and symbolically give your children back to God and trust Him with your children.

This is the link to the video : Max Lucado: Official Site of the Christian Author and ... or Fearless: Parenting Fearlessly | by Max Lucado

Watch it again and be blessed, and share the blessings with your friends :)

BOOKS For MOMS with TEENS

Visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

Below are some great and wonderful resources for Moms with teens. Click on titles to find out more about these books. The links will bring you to Amazon.com :) These books are available locally at SKS Bookstore and Baptist Bookstore.

• Got Teens?: Time-Tested Answers for Moms with Teens and Tweens by Jill Savage & Pam Farrel
  
• Preparing for Adolescence by Dr James Dobson
  
• Raising Unselfish Children in a Self-Absorbed World by Jill Rigby
  
• Boundaries with Teens: When to Say Yes, How to Say No by Dr Henry Cloud & John Townsend
  
• Parenting Teens with Love and Logic: Preparing Adolescents for Responsible Adulthood by Cline Foster & Jim Fay
  
• Mom, I Hate My Life: Becoming Your Daughter's Ally Through the Emotional Ups and Downs of Adolescence by Sharon Hersh
  
• Why Christian Kids Rebel: Trading Heartache for Hope by Tim Kimmel

Fearless Mom!

Visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

Our speaker for this Friday, Mrs Malar Solomon is sick and is unable to come and speak to us much as she will like to. God's Diet Plan will be rescheduled to another date. We will keep you posted.

We will still meet this Friday, 27th March with a different topic "Fearless Mom". And I don't think you will want to miss this session.

As moms, there are many many things that we are anxious and fearful about, many things that can cause and create a great amount of anxiety and fear in us - sick child, disobedient child, toddler not eating well, child not putting on weight, kid is rebellious, not studying, not listening, kid driving, kids in wrong company, a prodigal child, son's career, daughter's future... am I doing the right thing for my children? am I making the right decisions for them? am I guiding them down the right path? will I be able to provide for them, for their future...? Oh... there are just so many things to worry about.

And what do these anxieties and fear do to us, moms?

Is God aware of these fears within us, moms? Is He interested in us, moms? Can we be a fearless mom?

Come and find out this Friday, 27th March as we learn from Max Lucado what God is saying to us,moms and what we can do to be a fearless mom.

There is really so so much to learn from this session. This session may well be a start of a new journey of motherhood.

So do come and join us and find out for yourself where will this journey lead you to.

Do share this good news with a friend. Bring a friend along too.

Topic : Fearless Mom!

Date : 27th March 2009, Friday

Time : 9:00am - 11:30am

Place : Conference Rooms 1 & 2

Moms of Teen Girls

We have moved to wordpress.com blog. So visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Attention: Moms of Teen Girls

Go check out these two broadcast links on Focus on the Family before they are removed from the archives.

Listen to Dannah Gresh and Nancy Leigh DeMoss share with Focus on the Family how teen girls can identify and overcome cultural lies.

Protecting Teen Girls from Lies 1

Protecting Teen Girls From Lies 2

For a more in depth discussion, go to these links from Revive Our Hearts and listen to Nancy and Dannah share on Lies Young Women Believe in a radio series :

• I Wish I Had Known
  
• Freedom from Fear
  
• Countering Lies with the Truth
  
• The Highest Aspiration
  
• A Biblical View of Friendships and Dating
  
• Preparing Young Women for the Future
  

A Parent's Prayer

Visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

A Parent's Prayer

The late Garry C. Meyers, Co-founder of Highlights children magazine

O h, God, make me a better parent.

Help me to understand my children, to listen patiently to what they have to say and to answer all their questions kindly.
Keep me from interrupting them, talking back to them and contradicting them.

Make me as courteous to them as I would have them be to me.

Give me the courage to confess my sins against my children and to ask of them forgiveness, when I know that I have done them wrong.
May I not vainly hurt the feelings of my children.
Forbid that I should laugh at their mistakes or resort to shame and ridicule as punishment.
Let me not tempt a child to lie and steal.

So guide me hour by hour that I may demonstrate by all I say and do that honesty produces happiness.
Reduce, I pray, the meanness in me.
May I cease to nag; and when I am out of sorts, help me, O Lord, to hold my tongue.
Blind me to the little errors of my children and help me to see the good things that they do.
Give me a ready word for honest praise.

Help me to treat my children as those their own age, but let me not exact of them the judgements and conventions of adults.
Allow me not to rob them of the opportunity to wait upon themselves, to think, to choose, and to make decisions.
Forbid that I should ever punish them for my selfish satisfaction.

May I grant them all of their wishes that are reasonable and have the courage always to withhold a privilege which I know will do them harm.
Make me so fair and just, so considerate and companionable to my children that they will have a genuine esteem for me.
Fit me to be loved and imitated by my children.
With all thy gifts, O God, do give me calm and poise and self-control.

Amen

God's Diet Plan - 27th March 2009

We meet again after our 1 week school break with God's Diet Plan.

• What is God's Diet Plan for us?
  
• Can we follow this plan?
  
• Will this plan be effective?
  
• What are the benefits of this plan?  Short term benefits?  Long term effects?  
  
• What's is in it for me, for my family?
  

Come!  Taste and see that the Lord is good! .. Psalm 34:8

Join us this Friday, 27th March as we learn from our guest speaker, Mrs Malar Solomon what is so good and sweet about this Diet Plan.

Topic                    : God's Diet Plan

Guest Speaker    : Mrs Malar Solomon

Date                      : Friday, March 27th 2009

Time                     : 9:00-11:30am

Place                     : BRMC Conference Rooms 1 & 2

Heart2Heart Mothers' Fellowship

Inspiring Moms, Building Homes

The Warrior

Visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

The Warrior

This morning my thoughts traveled along
To a place in my life where, days have since gone
Beholding an image of what I used to be
As visions were stirred, and God spoke to me.

He showed me a Warrior, a soldier in place
Positioned by Heaven, yet I saw not the face
I watched as the Warrior fought enemies
That came from the darkness with destruction for me.

I saw as the Warrior would dry away tears
As all of Heaven's Angels hovered so near
I saw many wounds on the Warrior's face
Yet weapons of warfare were firmly in place.

I felt my heart weeping, my eyes held so much
As God let me feel the Warrior's prayer touched
I thought "how familiar" the words that were prayed
The prayers were like lightning that never would fade.

I said to God "Please, the Warrior's name"
He gave no reply,
He chose to refrain
I asked " Lord, who is broken that they need such prayer?"
He showed me an image of myself standing there.

Bound by confusion, lost and alone
I felt prayers of the Warrior carry me home
I asked "Please show me Lord, this Warrior so true"
I watched and I wept,
for Mother...the Warrior - was you!

~Written by Larry S. Clark~

Praying for Our Children

Visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

As we are going through the series on Preparing Our Children for the Future and having just completed "Prayer ... A Way ...", it may be apt to think about how and what we can pray for our children.

Praying for our children is more than God bless little Sarah or John. So here are some resources here that can help you start on praying for your children :

Articles from FamilyLife.Com

1. Fear Not, Mother ... Fear God

2. Going Beyond "God Bless Charlie"

3. The Power of Praying for Your Children

4. Daily Prayers for Your Children

5. 31 Biblical Virtues to Pray for Your Children

Podcasts you can listen to :

1. Praying for Your Children (An Interview with Sammy Tippit)

2. Praying Parents: Tips on How to Pray for Your Child

3. Impacting Our Children Through the Power of Prayer

(An Interview with missionaries Don & Sue Myers,

authors Susan Yates, Ann Arkins & Gary Harrill)

4. A Mighty Army of Moms (an interview with Fern Nichols)

Books on Praying for Our Children

1. Every Child Needs a Praying Mom by Fern Nichols

2. Praying the Scriptures for Your Children by Jodie Brendt

3. Praying the Scriptures for Your Teenagers: Discover How to Pray Gods Will for Their Lives

by Jodie Brendt

4. While They Were Sleeping: 12 Character Traits for Moms to Pray by Gary Harrell

5. When Mothers Pray: Bringing God's Power and Blessing to Your Children's Lives by Cheri Fuller

6. How to Pray for Your Children by Quinn Sherrer & Ruthanne Garlock

7. Miracles Happen When You Pray by Quinn Sherrer

Just click on the links above to find out more from each of these resources. These are probably enough to keep you busy for a while.

The above articles, podcasts and books have blessed many many moms and have helped many moms who are wondering where to start or how to start praying for their children.

So do go click on these links to learn more. The books are available at SKS Bookstore and Baptist Bookstore.

Another Mom's Take on "Prayer...A Way"

Visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

Here is another mom's take :

I liked the titanic story too.

To me...
The 1st ship that hit the icebergs - reminds me of how sometimes we can get so confident about ourselves that we do not see the "icebergs" under the water - not until we get hit real hard...

The 2nd ship that went into the unchartered waters in the dark - reminds me of faith and trust in God even when we are not able to see far ahead....Psalm 119 "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path". God guides and reveals to us as we take each step of faith and trust in Him.

The 3rd ship doing the illegal fishing - the Holy Spirit may convict us to do the right thing but sin or fear holds us back from taking the step of obedience.

Its all about Faith, Trust and Obedience.

Take away from "Prayer .. A Way ..."

Once again, we were glad we came to Heart2Heart as many of us went home blessed and enriched.

Below is one mom's take away from the session of Prayer ... A Way ... 

By Mommy S :

1) We are all unique in our own ways, our environment and circumstances (e.g. we have different lifestyles, different seasons in life) are unique, our prayers to God are unique (no two prayers are exactly alike).

2) The way we approach God thru prayers can reflect our relationship with God.  Someone said praying is like talking to GOD, so how you talk to God can reflect how you relate to God - linked to one's relationship with GOD?

3) The short video-clip, one key message I got was thru the imagery of a symphony - like it or not, we are all playing a song, so the question is not are you playing the song, but are you in tune in the song?  Are we playing the right 'key'?  And are we too caught up with the technicalities that we lose the purity & enjoyment of the song?
 
4) The story about the 2 ships & 1 boat was also good. 

The first ship - Titanic, was going fast into unchartered waters, didn't see ice-bergs below. 

The second ship whose captain was a godly man, was prompted and led by God (in pitch darkness)  into unchartered waters to save the survivors of the first ship.  And as daylight broke, this captain was in awe of God when he saw how dangerous and perilous his ship's night journey had been with the waters filled with icebergs.

Then there was the boat that was involved with illegal activities.  It couldn't and didn't go in to save the survivors of the first ship as the men on board were afraid of being found out.  These men were possibly haunted by guilt for the rest of their lives.  

In life, the destination is important. But the process - the journey - and how we travel - to reach the destination is also important.

 
Through prayers, reading the Living Word, we can choose to take time to seek the Lord, have a relationship with GOD, to come clean before God as we go thru life's journey (which is full of uncertainties & 'unchartered waters').  This may possibly help us to avoid or better-managed the unseen "icebergs" unrevealed to us yet. 
 
Alternatively, we can rush into life, take risks, and bumped into "icebergs" randomly, or worst still, continue to do "illegal activities" (struggle with sin & unrepentance) and thus can't come clean before GOD, to be used by GOD, to fulfill His purpose in our lives e.g. one of them would be to help others, to be a blessing to others, and usher them/bring them into the Kingdom of GOD - which is a safe place to be.

Indeed, we are all earthern vessels for the Lord. So are our "ships" or "boats" heading in the right direction? Is it travelling too fast & hitting ice-bergs? Is it leaking? Is it doing illegal activities?
 
5) I also like the "tightrope" imagery.  Very good to reflect about.  Life is like walking on this tight rope with many things to balance.  The pole, which helps us balance is like our prayer life and God's word.  And with that and our eyes on the target and destination, we will be able to navigate our way safely, across the tight rope to our destination.

From this session we also learn that we  communicate with God, our love, faithfulness, devotion to and for Him with our lives, such that our lives in itself be come a prayer.  And our bodies become a spiritual act of worship. In all things we give thanks and worship Him unceasingly through our lifes ...... even in our roles as mothers, wives, daughters etc.

We too learnt that, God's symphony, through creation, His word, and lives of godly people etc is also being played from time memorable.  Do we hear it?  The question is are we in tune with His symphony?

 

When we display sacrificial qualities (as mums,wives etc) and godly character/lives,  we stand apart from other tunes (seemingly not in sync with world's rhythm/tune), but that is when we are in tune with His symphony.  This is our expression to God of our love and faithfulness to God and our worship of God.

What kind of husband will your son grow up to be?

Visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

Have you thought about that? -- What kind of husband will your son grow up to be? What are we doing to prepare him for that role and responsibility?

Sheri Rose Shepherd, author of Preparing Him for the Other Woman: A Mother's Guide to Raising Her Son to Love a Wife and Lead a Family shares in this 20+ min video on what we can do to prepare our son to a faithful husband and devoted father.

Click on this link and watch the video. What kind of husband will your son grow up to be?

The book is available in our church library or you can purchase it from SKS Bookstore.

Book Editorial summary : This timely message gives mothers the faith, wisdom and strength to raise a toddler or a teen to grow up to be a great husband and a man of his word...equipped to remain faithful and experience a happy and healthy family.

It's true...A Mother's influence can change the success rate of the next generation's marriages.

What a great gift to give to our sons!

The time is now to prepare our boys for victory.

We do not have to wait for the world to change its moral fiber to win this war against broken homes, broken hearts, infidelity and divorce. A mother is the first lady in her son’s life and her love and influence in her beloved boy’s life can help change the success rate of the next generation’s marriages and rebuild the foundation of family ... one boy at a time.

A Timely Message for Moms

Visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

The recent news on teenage and young adult murder and suicide brought much disbelief to many of us and raised questions in our minds as to how we can protect and prevent our children from even having such thoughts.

Dr James Dobson shares with us in Focus on the Family daily broadcast the daily struggles of today's teens.

This audio is not just for moms of pre-teens and teens but for all moms as we strive to guide our children from babies to teens to adulthood.

Listen to it if you have not already done so.

Teens in Crisis: Why Parents Matter

Family Life & Marriage Relationship

Something exciting is happening on the last weekend of March!!

Campus Crusade has organised 2 fabulous seminars by Bill & Pam Farrel : 

1.  Family (parenting) - 26 & 27 Mar 7:30am-9:30am at Fairfield Methodist Church

2.  Marriage Life - 28 March 9:30am - 5pm at Barker Road Methodist Church.

Bill and Pam Farrel are authors of the best selling book "Men are like Waffles, Women are like Spaghetti.  You will have a hilarious time at the seminar as there is never a dull moment with this couple. 

Each of them has a lovely and touching testimony to share with us and you will be greatly blessed by the seminars.  

Please click on the links below to for more details :

Information on Family Life Seminar

Information on Marriage Relationship Seminar

And for a preview of their talk, go to this link  http://farrelcommunications.com/speaking.html

You will be so tickled by them.   ;)

Encouraging Words for Moms!

Are you feeling tired and weary?  Need some encouragement?  

Check out the Focus on the Family radio broadcast with Dee Brestin where she shares about the challenges of motherhood offering encouragement to weary moms.  You will definitely be encouraged :)

Click on links below to bring you the the broadcasts:

Encouraging Words for Moms 1

Encouraging Words for Moms 2

Teens in Crisis : Why Parents Matter

Visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

Moms of tweens and teens and even young adult children, please click on the link Teens in Crisis: Why Parent Matter or

http://listen.family.org/daily/A000001854.cfm to get on to the page to listen to this Focus on the Family broadcast.

The guests at the Focus of the Family broadcasts shared with the listeners how parents can cultivate a strong relationship with their children that can help prevent some potential problems that many of today's young adults face.

You will be blessed by it.

Finally... Prayer is A Way....

Finally, we will meet on 13th March, Friday 2009 with Prayer is A Way ....

We are all on a journey....

And this journey can be bumpy and rough at times....

What do we do when the road gets rough?  

(Anxieties over children and future .... family issues... heartaches... griefs...)

What do we do when we come to the cross roads?  

(Major decisions to make ...)

How to strike the right balances in the things we do - for ourselves, our family...?

Where does prayer come in?  Where do we even begin to pray?

 

Is prayer is a way ....

... of getting what we want

... of offloading and complaining

... of talking to God

... of communicating with God

... of relating with God

... of building our faith and trust in God

... ?

What do our prayers tell us about our relationship with God?

What do our prayers tell us about ourselves and the way we see our relationship with God?

Join us as we dig into God's word and learn from God's word what prayer is and some answers to some of the above questions.

Topic : Prayer is A Way ...

Date   : Friday, March 13th 2009

Time   : 9:00-11:30am

Place  : BRMC Conference Rooms 1 & 2

Heart2Heart Mothers' Fellowship

Inspiring Moms, Building Homes

Do You Know Where are Your Children Right Now?

Visit us at our new blog : Hearts of Moms Blog :)

Do You Know Where Are Your Children Right Now?

Where are they heading to?

What do we want them to become?

Challenging questions. Got many of us reflecting and thinking.

What are we doing to turn our children's spiritual dial, to set them in the God-ward direction? Do we see ourselves, moms, parents as the primary influencer in the spiritual development of our children? Or we know and acknowledge that we are the primary influencer and therefore, we are doing our part by 'sub-contracting' the job out by faithfully bringing them to Sunday School, small groups, getting the right story books for them to read etc? Is this what we mean by being the primary influencer?

We had a very enlightening sharing and discussion as the moms share from their childhood experiences of how their parents influenced them spiritually and left an impact on their lives. We also see that how we portray God to our children will also influence our children's perception of God and hence relationship with God. Do we use God's name in frivolously or threaten our children with severe punishment from God when they do wrong?

Today's discussion challenged us to reflect upon what we have been doing with our children in terms of directing them to God. It also challenges us to think about our own relationship with God. Unless we have a relationship with God, we can't be directing our children along this path to help them withstand the storms ahead.

Some good thoughts to ponder over for this weekend....

Blessing Our Church Counselor

Just a few photos from our last session of Seasons of A Mom's Life :

Our Church Counselor, Vivian sharing with us on the changes that we face in our Seasons of Life.

Blessing our counselor with a delicious chocolate cake.  Those of us who were able to stay behind for fellowship were blessed too with this yummy cake!  Forget about the diet!!  Yum! Yum! Chocolate Cake!  :)

Be Strong and Courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord will be with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9

May the Lord go with you and bring you back safely again to us :)

Yummy delicious fresh cream chocolate cake with macrons from ET Artisan Sweets ( http://www.etasweets.com  ) Each of us had more than one helping :) Yummy!!